Mississippi – A 76-year-old woman has created controversy yesterday, by breastfeeding her 42-year-old son in the middle of a KFC restaurant. Many customers of the fast food joint would of complained about the incident and prompted Linda Berrety and her son, Michael, to leave the establishment. Both finally got expelled.

This unusual episode has sparked strong reactions on social medias and provoked a huge debate on the limits of breastfeeding in public places, while many customers present at the time of the event seem to have seen a gesture of sexual nature and incest, rather than a gesture of maternal concern.

“What in God’s name was that?” claims Ali Belfouz, a customer who witnessed the whole scene. “I have nothing against breastfeeding, but that was pure nonsense. I felt like if I was watching some fetish type of porno. You have to be insane to breastfeed your child at that age. They should of got arrested for gross indecency rather then getting expelled.”

“It’s my right as a mother to breastfeed my child,” says Mrs. Berrety. “If people don’t agree with the way I raise my son, that’s their problem. I have raised a great man, beautiful, tall, who still lives and stays with me. I think I’ve done a great job as a mother and don’t appreciate getting insulted and expelled just because I decided to breastfeed my child a little longer than other mothers.”
The chances of winning of the 76-year-old woman would be pretty excellent, according to many legal experts. Since 1976, the United States Bill of Rights prevents all discrimination against women breastfeeding in public, that at many occasions, merchants were condemned to pay important fines to women who were asked to stop breastfeeding or expelled for doing so.

Janice Brown, 32, of Dallas was recently arrested and charged with over 30 felony counts of sexual abuse. Over the course of three years, investigators said Brown molested her four children aged three to fourteen. Full details have not been released, but investigators claim the abuse involved inappropriate touching and oral sex. Brown’s long-term roommate finally stepped forward and reported the crimes.

“She my friend since we was two and I didn’t want to be no rat,” the roommate said. “But what I watched her do over three years made me sick to my tummy, especially when she started letting men pay to watch, and I could no longer keep my lips zipped even though I’d pinky swore not to tell.”

However, court records report a bizarre twist in the case: Brown claims her innocence saying ‘The Ghost of Michael Jackson’ molested her four children.

“I love that Thriller album,” Brown said. “But when I’d play Thriller the kids would start crying like somebody was beating them and I wondered what that was about. Now I know Michael Jackon’s ghost was molesting them. People say Michael touched kids when he was alive, so why wouldn’t he do it when he dead? I hope police hire the Ghost Busters to catch Michael Jackson and lock his ghost away forever. I know they got devices for locking up ghosts so they can’t escape.”

Brown said once she is exonerated she plans a lawsuit.

“I know Michael Jackson be dead, but once the Ghost Busters catch Michael Jackson, I think somebody still have all the money he made off this music. Maybe Janet Jackson or La Toya got it. I’m gonna sue them and take all they got for what Michael done. I still love Michael’s music, but Michael Jackson need to pay for molesting my babies.”

Tito and Amanda Watts were arrested over the weekend for selling “golden tickets to heaven” to hundreds of people. The couple, who sold the tickets on the street for $99.99 per ticket, told buyers the tickets were made from solid gold and each ticket reserved the buyer a spot in heaven — simply present the ticket at the pearly gates and you’re in.

“People can sell tickets to heaven,” a Jacksonville police spokesman said. “But the Watts misrepresented their product. The tickets were just wood spray painted gold with ‘Ticket To Heaven – Admit One’ written in marker. You can’t sell something as gold when it’s not. That’s where the Watts crossed the line into doing something illegal.”

Tito Watts said in his police statement:

I don’t care what the police say. The tickets are solid gold… it ain’t cut up two by fours I spray painted gold. And it was Jesus who give them to me behind the KFC and said to sell them so I could get me some money to go to outer space. I met an alien named Stevie who said if I got the cash together he’d take me and my wife on his flying saucer to his planet that’s made entirely of crack cocaine. You can smoke all the crack cocaine there you want… totally free. So, try to send an innocent man to jail and see what happens. You should arrest Jesus because he’s the one that gave me the golden tickets and said to sell them. I’m willing to wear a wire and set Jesus up…

Amanda Watts said in her police statement:

We just wanted to leave earth and go to space and smoke rock cocaine. I didn’t do nothing. Tito sold the golden tickets to heaven. I just watched.Police said they confiscated over $10,000 in cash, five crack pipes and a baby alligato